Walking in Two Worlds

Day 116 – Most of my friends and my family are aghast at turning tides that are our political reality; deeply concerned, as am I, we post and respond to each other and at each other on FB. As Rolf describes in this reading: “We are betrayed, we are abandoned, our worst fears have been realized, we are unworth. But–life goes on.”
This is avidya. Rolf describes it: “We are defined by externals–by what we do and by all the ways we come up short. Within this view, disillusionment and despair are part of every person’s repertoire.” In order to experience the antithesis, vidya–knowledge–Rolf suggests we only reflect on any number of moments in our lives where we have convinced ourselves that nothing is more important than the stuck place we find ourselves. And so if feels so on FB. Nothing seems more important than speaking out against what may or may not come to pass. Truly, it all starts, as Rolf describes “during a fever pitch of obessive worry, concern, or self-doubt.”
Nonetheless, I walk in this world. I step onto my mat not to forget the world, but to work on my inner world, to “pause and connect to another reality” where there is a “sense of timelessness.” In this moment, it is just as Rolf puts it: “despite our damning circumstances, we suddenly have a feeling that things are going to be all right after all.” This is vidya, however brief it is. To me, this is also hope, faith, prayer, gratitude, and sacredness.
Most of us walk in two worlds anyway. Few of us have the luxury as working adults, mothers, fathers, sons and daughters, sisters and brothers, to check out completely (although we numb ourselves in other ways both positive and negative). Fear and loathing, discontent and disappointment, disconnect and confusion are all part of the walk. I go to my mat to minimize that, sort it out. In the silence now, however brief, I am able to let go now. I will not let life’s circumstances fester. I will speak out, but I will not succomb.

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